Mens Advice To Women
Men's Advice To
Women
<p style="text-indent: 33">1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">2. Learn to work the toilet seat; if it's up, put it down.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">3. Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">4. Get rid of your cat.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">5. Sunday = TV Sports.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">6. Anything you wear is fine. Really.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">7. You have too many shoes.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">8. Crying is blackmail.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">9. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">10. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">11. Peeing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">12. Simple "yes" and "no" are perfectly acceptable answers.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">13. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">14. Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">15. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">16. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">17. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done -- not both.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">18. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">19. You have enough clothes.</p>
<p style="text-indent: 33">20. Men are from earth; women are from earth. Deal with it.</p>
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