FAITH...HOPE...LOVE
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Funny how in your darkest hours, you'll hang on to anything you think will help save you from feeling the despair you're feeling at moments. <br><br>
Another day I wake up with the feeling that I need to get out of here to keep my sanity, to keep on living. 1:30 pm: We head out of the city to show one of your new out of town friends a little town you once showed and told me how it was one of your favorite places you liked to visit. <br><br>
We get to our destination, and as we wonder around with you sharing your smiles and laughter with her, showing her your favorite shops, I watch from the background and remember the times when it used to be me.<br><br>
I run out of one of the stores as a wave of emotions hits me. I find a deserted table and a seat, I light up a cigarette and as I take a drag, a feeling of hurt and anger consume me. <br><br>
I slam my hand on the table with a passion filled with anger; anger at myself for still caring, anger at myself for being so blind all along, anger over something that's not worth how I'm feeling.<br><br>
We continue visiting the little antique shops, while I carry with me this feeling of emptiness inside of me; an emptiness that weighs heavy in my heart and heavy on my body.<br><br>
As we enter the last shop in our tour, I stand by the door as you both take off to look around. I hear you both laughing in the back of the store. I feel so alone. I close my eyes to stop the tears from falling and call out to GOD: " Dear God, Please grant me the patience and strength I need until I get myself out of this mess I put myself in". <br><br>
I swallow the tears and open my eyes once again. As I open my eyes and look around, something catches my eyes; three hearts hanging from a string. The first heart had the word FAITH. The second heart had the word HOPE and the third heart had the word LOVE.<br><br>
As I stare at the string of hearts and the words on them echo in my mind, I feel the tears rolling down my cheek. Faith, Hope, Love. Isn't that what makes life worth living? Three things missing from my life right now.<br><br>
I reach out for the string of hearts and hold them in my hand so tight. I wipe my tears, head to the cashier, and pay for my string of hearts to take home with me; to remind me to hang on to my string of life in my moments of despair, to never give up on what makes life worth living: Faith..Hope..Love.<br><br>
As we drive back home, listening to both of you in the front seat carry on with your laughter and conversation, I feel once again a moment of despair, but not for long, as I reach into my pocket and pull out my little string of hearts. Something to hang on to, until I find life again; FAITH..HOPE..LOVE.
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