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'Preparation is as much psychological as practical'
Confidence can make or break your career. Luckily for those lacking it, self-belief is easy to boost.
How important is confidence?
“Hugely from a leadership and team perspective,” says Rob Yeung, a corporate psychologist at Talentspace and author of Confidence: The Art of Getting Whatever you Want.
“You must be confident for others to have confidence in you. People equate confidence with competence.”
Bob Etherington, a sales, negotiation and presentation trainer, says it can be the difference between success and failure. “Companies aren’t run by people who are the best but by people who think they’re the best.”
What about faking it?
“Often you do need to feign confidence at first,” says Mr Etherington. “You try and adopt the feeling of someone who knows what they’re doing.”
But, he adds, the best thing about faking confidence is that it often evolves into the real thing. “You get a picture in your mind of the outcome you want. Athletes do it all the time – they see the ball going into the hole. Even though you don’t really believe it, your brain latches on to it. That gets your confidence going.”
What can I do to build my confidence?
When engaging in conversation or making presentations, Mr Etherington’s advice is: “Speak clearly and drop your voice, stand with your feet about 30 centimetres apart, use your hands when you talk and make eye contact.”
Peter Shaw, an executive coach at Praesta, says that personal experiences can also help. “Remember occasions when you have been confident in the past. Encapsulate memories of success,” he says. “You could also have a mantra, like ‘I can do this’ or ‘Keep calm and carry on’. Or you can think of situations where you’re confident outside of work and then transfer some of that into the work environment.”
Mr Yeung says: “Psychologists also talk about the ‘illusion of transparency’. Most people believe that when they are nervous everyone can see this. But they can’t. Just remembering this can make you more confident.”
How important is preparation?
Two ways to improve how you come across are to make sure you have done your homework and to show up to meetings with plenty of time to spare. “You may not actually need to read all those pages the night before but it will boost your confidence,” says Mr Shaw. “Preparation is as much psychological as practical.”
Arriving early is also a good way to collect your thoughts. “If you arrive flustered and have to apologise, you won’t inspire confidence in those you’re meeting and you start on the back foot.”
Can you be overconfident?
There is a fine line between self-belief and arrogance. A confident manager is grounded enough to “accept criticism and welcome feedback”, adds Mr Yeung.
译文：
信心能影响你事业的成败。幸运的是，对缺乏自信的人来说，信心是很容易提升的。
自信有多重要？
Talentspace的企业心理学家罗布•杨(Rob Yeung)表示：“从领导力和团队的角度来看，非常重要。”杨著有《自信：心想事成的技巧》(Confidence: The Art of Getting Whatever you Want)一书。
“你必须相信其他人对你有信心。人们将信心等同于竞争力”。
销售、谈判和演讲培训人鲍勃•埃瑟林顿(Bob Etherington)表示，自信可以决定你成功与否。“公司的管理者不是最优秀的人才，而是自认为最优秀的人”。
假装自信怎样？
埃瑟林顿表示：“通常你一开始确实需要假装自信。你要努力模仿那些胸有成竹的人的情绪。”
但他补充称，假装自信的最佳之处在于它往往会演变成真正的自信。“你在脑海中勾画自己想要获得的结果，运动员一直是这么做的——他们在脑海中看到球落入了篮筐里。即便你并非真的相信它，你的大脑也会留下印象。这会激发你的自信”。
我如何才能建立自信？
埃瑟林顿的建议是，当与人交谈或发表讲话时，“吐字清晰，降低音调，双脚分开约30公分，说话时运用手势，并与听众进行目光接触”。
Praestad的高级教练彼得•肖(Peter Shaw)表示，个人经历也能有所帮助。他表示：“记住你曾经自信满满的时刻。封装成功的记忆。你还可以给自己想个咒语，比如‘我能做到’或者‘保持镇定并继续’。或者回想起你在工作之外感到自信的场合，随后把一部分场景转变为工作环境。”
杨表示：“心理学家也提到了‘被洞悉错觉’(illusion of transparency)。大多数人认为，当自己紧张时，所有人都会知道，但事实并非如此。只要记住这一点便可以让你更自信。”
提前准备有多重要？
提升表现有两个办法：确保你做足功课和早到。肖表示：“你实际上可能不需要在前一天晚上阅读全部资料，但它会提升你的信心。提前准备既有心理效果，又有现实效果。”
早到也是集中思想的好办法。“如果你慌慌张张地赶到目的地，并不得不为此道歉，那些与你会晤的人就不会对你有信心，因此你一开始就处于不利地位。”
一个人有可能自信过头吗？
自信与傲慢之间有着细微差别。杨还补充道，一个自信的经理头脑清醒，能够“接受批评并欢迎反馈”。 | 
发表于 2010-12-13 21:51
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