| 
 
     
- UID
 - 12794 
 - 帖子
 - 8830 
 - 积分
 - 11321 
 - 学分
 - 56047 个 
 - 金币
 - 800 个 
 - 在线时间
 - 823 小时 
 
   
 | 
| 
                     
                 
                  
致命的大错:  "Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10." 
  "Qualifications: No education or experience." 
  "I am relatively intelligent, obedient and loyal as a puppy." 
  "My compensation should be at least equal to my age." 
  "Reason for Leaving: It had to do with the IRS, FBI and SEC." 
  "Fired because I fought for lower pay." 
  "Size of employer: Very tall, probably over 6"5" . 
  " "Please disregard the enclosed resume-it is terribly out of date." 
  "Reason for Leaving: My boss said the end of the world is near." 
  "Reason for Leaving: The owner gave new meaning to the word "paranoia." I prefer to elaborate privately." 
  打字错误与语法错误 
  "Here are my qualifications for you to overlook." 
  "Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer." 
  "I am a rabid typist." 
  "Work History: Performed brain wave tests,1879-1981." 
  "After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided to pursue a new line of work." 
  "Accounting cleric." 
  "As indicted, I have over five years of experience analyzing investments." 
  "Suspected to graduate early next year." 
  "Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets." 
  "Proven ability to track down and correct erors." 
  "Accomplishments: Oversight of entire department." 
  "Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details." 
  "Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school." 
  不应有的幽默 
  "Note: Keep this resume on top of the stack. Use all others to heat your house." 
  "Assisted in daily preparation of large quantities of consumable items in a fast-paced setting." (Translation: Short-order cook.) 
  "But wait……there"s more. You get all this business knowledge plus a grasp of marketing that is second nature." 
  "I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse." 
  "My fortune cookie said, "Your next interview will result in a job"-and I like your company in particular." 
  "Title: Another resume from the "Profiles in Excellence" series." 
  "Also Known As: Mr. Productivity, Mr. Clever, Mr.Fix-it." 
  "Trustworthy references available upon request-if I give them a few bucks." 
  "Let"s meet so you can "ooh" and "ahh" over my experience." |   
 
 
                    
                     
 
 
 |