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some ofyour ideas are pretty good, such as comparing Buck's life style changed to a person's environment changed, the belief that harding working could lead to success, and your way of interpreting the one of the major theme "Instinct".
however, your review involves too much summary of the book. It would be better if it shows more of your insights rather than just retelling the story once more. This may also contributes to the lack of focus in your review. Select themes that touches you, and develop your voice in your review.

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