汶川,我的心随你而动 汶川

tingroom

汶川地震,牵动着大家的心,下面这篇文章是我一个朋友近期写的,说是会有写得不对的地方,大家有时间有兴趣可以帮忙改一下.没时间看一下也可以,交流一下大家心理的感受.他说本来还能的更多,只是写到这里写不下去了.

        How could you imagine  little guys are playing on the playground happly and  enjoyablely, then everything changed abruptly with the ground splitted, water eruptted, flooded into the classroom, destroyed good memories?How could you imagine the picture: a younger mother fed her several-month baby ,then crushed under the concretes wiht their mouth open? This may be the most painful things that everyone doesn't expect to encounter.
        As we all knew, a  terrible earthquake happened in Sichuan province this month. Its powerful wave spreaded almost every corner of our country, and caused over 50 thousand people to die  in a very short time. Since there was not any forecast before the earthquake ocurred, it shaked suddenly. Fortunately, it did happened during the day instead of the night. if that so, this destroyed areas might suffer more .  All these places were full of stavation, homelessnesses, orphanes and so on. Thanks to the consideration taken by our nation. it's so poor and so pity. A real catastrophe in my life, I hate it!
        After we watched CCTV, a lot of people in low mood cried and sobbed . What impressed me most was that that image:  a young mother put her bubby into her  young daughter’s mouth without any painful feeling. Such picture made me sad deeply. Mum gave birth to us, fed us then  offered us education at school. So we should love our mother, making her happy everyday.
Apparently, there lies love around, not noly at home and abroad but also at every school. They donated clothes, shoes, money and so on. Moreover, someone donated their blood to “Red cross” for people in trouble, others did what they could to help this people.
         But, several days passed, illness and drough came. Although we could not protect them from suffering , we could rebuild hometown for these injuries suffered a lot during the earthquake, helping them with our bless and action.  Hard as it was, some poeple escapled from the earthquake also died  due to their  heavy hit on their legs or spines, or the like.
        so pity and helpless. How swift the life ends!
         As a healthy and responsible  man, we should gather together and make our nation a peaceful world .

viscas

"then crushed under the concretes wiht their mouth open?"  (spelling)

I did not get the last part,   what did you try to tell us?" with their mouth open?".
(may be its my understanding problem). and why used question mark.

"This may be the most painful
things"  

"illness and drough came"  did you mean drought

"Although we could not protect them from suffering , we could rebuild hometown"   in my opinion I would like to use can to instead of could

还有些句子 说不出什么感觉，觉得读起来怪怪的。
我胡说八道了半天 以上的个人意见如果大家有什么不对的地方请大家给我指出来