每天讲个英语幽默故事(接力) 英语, 幽默, 故事, 接力

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在放松中学习英语是大家的追求,更是美的享受!点点英语,铸就未来^-^
Second language

　A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she spotted a cat crouched behind a bush. She watched the cat, and the cat watched the mice.

　　Mother mouse barked fiercely, "Woof, woof, woof!" The cat was so terrified that it ran for it's life.

　　Mother mouse turned to her babies and said, "Now, do you understand the value of a second language?"

　　一只母老鼠带着孩子出来散步，突然她看见一只猫正在灌木丛中虎视耽耽。

　　母老鼠向着猫叫道：“汪，汪，汪”，猫听了非常害怕，拼命跑走了。

　　母老鼠回过头洋洋自得的对孩子说：“现在你知道外语的重要性了吧。”

wuqisheep

These stories are very facetious!

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Ashamed Soldier [来 源] 学知识  

Ashamed Soldier


Peter joined the army when he was eighteen, and for several months he was taught how to be a good soldier. He did quite well in everything except shooting. One day he and his friends were practicing their shooting, and all of them were doing quite well except Peter. After he had shot at the target nine times and had not hit it once,  the officer who was trying to teach the young  soldiers  to shoot said, "You're quite hopeless, Peter! Don't waste your last bullet too! Go behind that wall and shoot yourself with it!"


Peter felt ashamed. He went behind the wall, and a few seconds later the officer and the other young soldiers heard the sound of a shot.


"Heavens!" the officer said. "Has that silly man really shot himself?"


He ran behind the wall anxiously, but Peter was all right. "I'm sorry, sir," he said, "but I missed again."


惭愧的士兵


　　彼得十八岁那年参了军，他需要参加几个月的学习以成为一名好士兵。彼得在其他方面都做得很好，但是射击不行。一天他和伙伴们练习射击，除了彼得其他人都没有问题。他射了九次，一次也没有命中目标。这时，教新兵射击的教官说：“彼得，你看来是没希望了，不要连最后一发子弹都浪费掉！去那堵墙后面用它向自己打一枪吧。”

　　彼得感到非常惭愧。他走到那堵墙后面。几分钟后，教官和新兵们听到一声枪响。

　　“上帝！”教官叫起来，“难道那个笨蛋真的朝自己开枪了？”

　　他急忙跑到那堵墙后面，发现彼得安然无恙。“对不起，长官，”他说，“我还是没有命中。”

njhyl

very goood!

phil792

非常好

simonpapers

伊索寓言——人与赛特-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：

    A Man and a Satyr having struck up an acquaintance, sat down together to eat. The day being wintry and cold, the Man put his fingers to his mouse and blew opon them. "What's that for, my friend?" asked the Satyr. " My hands are so cold," said the Man, "I do it to warm them." In a little while some hot food was placed before them, and the Man, raising the dish to his mouse, again blew opon it. "And what's the meaning of that, now?" said the Satyr. "Oh," replied the Man, "my porridge is so hot, I do it to cool it." "Nay, then," said the Satyr, "from this moment I renounce your friendship, for I will have nothing to do with one who blows hot and cold with the same mouse."


译文：

    一个人与赛特偶然相识，坐在一起吃东西。正值冬季，天气很冷，那人把手放在嘴边哈气。赛特问道“我的朋友，那是干吗？”这人说“我的手太冷了，这是为了取暖”。过了一会儿，热腾腾的食物端上来了，那人把碟子举到嘴边又吹了起来，赛特问“这又是干吗？”，那人说“哦，我的粥太烫了，我把他吹凉些”。赛特说“从现在起，我要与你绝交，因为我不想和一个反复无常的人做朋友”。

词汇：

atyr 赛特(希腊神话中半人半羊的神)

strike up an acquaintance 偶然成为朋友

porridge 粥

renounce 拒绝，放弃

simonpapers

伊索寓言——守财奴-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识

原文：

    A Miser, to make sure of his property, sold all that he had had converted it into a great lump of gold, which he hid in a hole in the ground, and went continually  to visit and inspect it. This roused the curiosity of one of his workmen, who, suspecting that there was a treasure, when his master's back was turned went to the spot and stole it away. When the Miser returned and found the place empty, he wept and tore his hair. But a neighbor who saw him in this extravagant grief, and learned the cause of it, said: "Fret thyself no longer, but take a stone and put it in the same place, and think that it is your lump of gold; for, as you never meant to use it, the one will do you as much gold as the other."

    The worth of money is not in its possession, but in its use.



译文：

    一个守财奴，为了确保他的财产，卖掉所有家当换成了一大块金子，埋在一个地洞里，并且不时地去查看，这引起了手下一个雇工的好奇。雇工猜测那里肯定有宝贝，趁主人离开之际，他来到埋藏地点，把金子偷走了。当守财奴回来发现金子不翼而飞，便痛哭流涕，乱撮头发。一个邻人见状问明原由后说“你也别太痛苦了，拿一块石头再埋在原地，就当是那块金子好了，因为既然你永远不想用它，那么两者不是一回事吗”。
    金钱的价值不在于拥有，而在于使用。

词汇：

extravagant 过分的

thyself = yourself

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伊索寓言——一捆木柴-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识

原文：

    A Husbandman who had a quarrelsome family ,after having tried in vain to reconcile them by words ,thought he might more readily prevail by an example .So he called his sons and bid them lay a bundle of sticks before him .Then ,having tied them into a fagot, he told the lads ,one after the other ,to take it up and break it .They all tied ,but tried in vain .Then untying the fagot ,he gave them the sticks to break one by one .This they did with the greatest ease .Then said the father:"Thus you ,my sons ,as long as you remain united ,are a match for all you enemies ;but differ and separate ,and you are undone."
    Union is strength.

译文：

    一个农夫，家庭不和睦，用言语劝告大家和好，总是无效，最后他想，用实际例子可能容易说服他们。于是他把儿子都叫来，吩咐他们抱一捆火柴放在他的面前。他把火柴捆成一捆，接着叫这些孩子挨次拿起来折断它，一个个都试过了，但都没有折断，接着他解了捆，一根一根地给他们折，他们都轻而易举地折断了。这时父亲说："孩子们，只要我们团结一致，你们就能对付一切敌人；但是如果意见不合，各自东西，那么你们一定要失败。"
    团结就是力量。

词汇：   

Husbandman 农夫

fagot 一捆

a match for ……的对手

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伊索寓言——牧童和狼-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    A Shepherd-boy, who tended his flock not far from a village, used to amuse himself at times in crying out"wolf !wolf!"Twice or thrice his trick succeeded .The whole village came running out to his assistance when all the return they got was to be laughed at for their pains .At last one day the wolf came indeed .The boy cried out in earnest. But his neighbors, supposing him to be at his old sport, paid no heed to his cries, and the wolf devoured the sheep. So the boy learned, when it was too late, that liars are not believed even when they tell the truth.

译文：

    一个放羊的孩子在离村子不远的地方放羊。他为了开心寻乐常喊："狼来了！狼来了！"他的恶作剧有两三次达到了目的。全村的人都跑来帮忙，而他们所得到的回报却是一顿嘲笑，白费了心力。最后，有一天狼真的来了。这个孩子认真地大喊起来。但是他的邻人们却以为他又在耍把戏，谁都不理会他的喊叫，于是狼把羊吃了。因此这牧童得到了教训：爱说谎的人，甚至在他说真话的时候，也没人相信他，但是他知道得太晚了。

词汇：

Shepherd-boy 牧羊童

trick 诡计

at his old sport 耍他的老把戏

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伊索寓言——旅行者和熊-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识

原文：

    Two friends were traveling on the same road together, when they met with a bear .The one, in great fear, without a thought of his companion, climbed up into a tree, and hid himself .The other, seeing that he had on chance single-handed against the bear, had nothing left but to throw himself on the ground and feign to be dead, for he had heard that the bear will never touch a dead body .A s he thus lay, the bear came up to his head, muzzling and snuffing at his nose, and ears, and heart, but the immovably held his breath, and the beast, supposing him to be dead, walked away .When the bear was fairly out of sight, his companion came down out of the tree, and asked what it was that the bear whispered to him-"for"says he, "I observed he put his mouth very close to your ear . ""why,"replies the other, "it was no great secret, he only bid me have a care how I kept company with those who, when they get into a difficulty, leave their friends in a lurch."


词汇：

single-handed 独自一人，孤立无援

lurch 危难

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伊索寓言——树和斧子-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    A Woodman came into a forest to ask the Trees to give him a handle for Ax. It seemed so modest a request that the principal tree at once agreed to it, and it was settled among them that the plain, homely Ash should furnish what was wanted. No sooner had the Woodman fitted the staff to his purpose ,than he began laying about him on all side. felling the whole matter too late, whispered to the Cedar: "the first concession has lost all ;if we has not a sacrificed our humble neighbor, we might have yet stood for ages ourselves."

译文：

    有一个樵夫来到森林里，要求树给他一跟斧柄，看来他的请求非常谦虚，立刻得到了树的首领的同意。他们决定由平凡而朴素的白杨树来提供所需要的东西。樵夫刚按好斧柄，就开始到处乱砍，森林里最高的树都砍倒了，树林现在察觉大势已去，就小声对衫树说："第一次的让步已失去了一切。如果我们不牺牲我们的小小的邻居，我们自己还可以活无数年呢。"

词汇：

the principal tree 领头树

was settled among them 大家商定

no sooner...than... 一……就……

laying about him 向他四周乱砍

might have yet stood for ages 也许还能活几百年

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伊索寓言——大山分娩-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：

    In days of yore, a mighty runmbling was heard in a mountain. It was said to be in labor, and multitudes flocked together, from far and near, to see what it would produce. After long expectation and many wise conjectures from the by-standers -- out popped a Mouse!

    The story applies those magnificent promises end in a paltry performance.

译文：

    古时候，在一座山里发出了一阵隆隆巨响，据说这是大山要临产了。人群从四面八方聚集起来，观看大山会生出什么后代。大家企盼了许久，并且作了许多聪明的推测，结果从那里跳出一只老鼠。
这个故事说的是，雷声大，雨点小。

词汇：

In days of yore 古时候

in labor 临产

multitudes flocked together 人群聚集

by-standers 旁观者

out popped 跳出

paltry 微不足道的

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伊索寓言——鹰和箭-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    A Bowman took aim at an Eagle and hit him in the heart. As the Eagle turned his head in the agonies of death, he saw that the Arrow was winged with his own feathers. "How much sharper," said he, "are the wounds made by weapons which we ourselves have supplied!"

词汇：

bowman 弓箭手
took aim at 瞄准
in the agonies of death 疼得死去活来
was winged 配箭翎
sharper （疼痛）更剧烈

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伊索寓言——母狮子-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识
原文：

    There was a great stir made among all the Beasts, which could boast of largest family. So they came to the Lioness. "And how many," said , "do you have at a birth?" "One," said she, grimly, "but that one is a lion."

    Quality comes before quantity.

译文：

    一场大比拼在所有野兽中展开了，看看谁敢夸耀自己的家族最大。众野兽来到母狮子跟前，问道：“你一胎能生产几个？”“一个”，狮子凶横地说，“但那是一头狮子”。
    质量重于数量。

词汇：

stir 轰动，骚动

boast of    自夸

at a birth 一胎

grimly 冷酷地，可怕地
v

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伊索寓言——鹅与鹤-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    Some Geese and some Cranes fed together in the same field. One day the sportsmen came suddenly down upon them. The Cranes being light of body, flew off in a moment; but the geese, weighted down by their fat, were all taken.

    In civil commotions, they fare best who have least to fetter them.

词汇：

geese 鹅（复数)

crane 鹤

come suddenly down upon 突然袭击

weighted down 过重而坠

have least to fetter> 最少牵挂

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伊索寓言——狼和羊-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    A Wolf that had been bitten by a Dog, and was in a very sad case, being unable to move, called to a Sheep that was passing by, and begged her to fetch him some water from the neighboring stream. "For if you," said he, "will bring me drink, I will find meat myself." "Yes," said the Sheep, "I make no doubt of it; for, if I come near enough to give you the drink, you will soon make mince-meat of me."

词汇：

make no doubt of it 毫不怀疑

make mince-meat of me> 拿我当肉吃

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伊索寓言——老鬣狗-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    A Hound, who had been excellent one in his time, and had done good service to his master in the field, at length become worn out with the weight of years and trouble. One day, when hunting the wild boar, he seized the creature by the ear, but his teeth giving way, he was forced to let go his hold, and the boar escaped. Upon this the huntsman, coming up, severely rate him. But the feeble Dog replied: "Spare your old servant! it was the power not not the will that failed me. Remember rather what I was, than abuse me for what I am.

词汇：

in his time 想当年
at length 后来，最后
worn out 累垮了
the weight of years and trouble 长年劳累
seized ... by the ear 咬住 ... 的耳朵
give way 让步

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伊索寓言——狼与鹤-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识

原文：

    A Wolf had got a bone stuck in his throat and in the greatest agony ran up and down, beseeching every animal he met to relieve him, at the same time hinting at a very handsome reward to the successful operator. A Crane, moved by his entreaties and promises, ventured her long neck down the Wolf's throat, and drew out the bone. She then modestly for the promised reward. To which the Wolf, grinning and showing his teeth, replied with seeming indignation: "Ungreateful creature! to ask for any other reward than that you have put you head into a wolf's jaws and brought it safe again!"

    Those who are charitable only in the hope of a return must not be surprised if in their dealings with evil men, they meet with more jeers than thanks.

词汇：

in the great agony 极其痛苦

with seeming indignation 充满怒气

hinting at 暗示

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伊索寓言——龟兔赛跑-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

  A hare jeered at a tortoise for the slowness of his pace .But he laughed ,and said that he would run against her and beat her any day she would name ."Come on ," said the hare ,"you will soon see what my feet are made of ."So it was agreed that they should start at once .The tortoise went off jogging along ,without a moment's stopping ,at his usual steady pace .The hare treating the whole matter very lightly ,said he would first take a little nap ,and that she should soon overtake the tortoise .Meanwhile ,the tortoise plodded on ,and the hare ,oversleeping herself ,arrived at the goal ,only to see that the tortoise had got in before her .
Slow and steady wins the race.


译文：

    兔子嘲笑乌龟的步子爬的慢，但是他笑了，说总有一天他会和她赛跑，并且赢他。"快点"，兔子说，"你很快会看到我是跑的多么的快。"他们打算马上就开始比赛。乌龟拼命的爬，一刻都不停止，兔子认为比赛太轻松了，他说他先打个盹，然后很快的可以追上乌龟。同时乌龟坚持爬行，当兔子醒来跑到的时候只能看着乌龟在他前面到达终点。
    稳扎稳打终能胜利。

词汇：

jeer at 嘲笑

tortoise 乌龟

go off 离开

usual steady pace 平时的稳定的步伐

over-take 超过，赶上

plod on 沉重地向前

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伊索寓言——青蛙和牛-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：

  An ox, grazing in a swampy meadow, chanced to set his foot among a parcel of young frogs, and crushed nearly the whole brood to death .One that escaped ran off to his mother with the dreadful news."and ,oh ,mother !"said he ,"it was a beast -such a big four footed beast!-that did it .""Big?" quoth the old frog , "How big? Was it as big" -- and she puffed herself out to a great degree-"as big as this ?""oh!"said the little one ,"a great deal bigger than that .""well, was it so big ?"and she swelled herself out yet mere ."Indeed ,mother ,but it was ,and of you were to burst yourself you would never reach half its size."provoked at such a disparagement of her powers, the old frog made one more trial ,and burst herself indeed.
So men are ruined by attempting greatness to which they have no claim.


译文：

    一头牛在一快泥泞的草地上吃草，偶然把脚踏在一堆小青蛙当中，几乎把所有的幼蛙踩死。脱险的一个带着这可怕的消息跑到他母亲那里去了。"啊，母亲！"他说"是一只野兽-那样一只有四只脚的大野兽-踩的。""大吗？"老青蛙说。"多大？"她股足了气把自己胀得大大的说："他像这样的吗？""啊！"小 青蛙说，"比那大多了。""哦，有这么大吗？"她鼓着气胀地更大了。"真的，母亲，但确实如此，即使你胀破了自己，也不够他一半大。"老青蛙看到自己的力气受到轻视很是激怒，于是又鼓了一下气，果然这次胀破了自己。
    妄自尊大的人必将自取灭亡的。

词汇：

grazing 吃草

a parcel of 一群

brood 一窝

quoth 说（古代）

puffed herself out 鼓气把自己吹大

disparagement 轻视